Expedition to the Barrier Peaks - Chapter One

[Pulpatoon]

Porphyry begins screaming, cycling through the different languages he knows, expressing the ultimate in alarm as each language frames it:
Common: "HELP! Do something!"
Dwarvish: "Fire and flood! Sound the klaxons!"
Elvish: "Fil-le-de-didly-day! Wilt mine eyes see the blossoms of Spring e're anon?"
Goblin: "Rat-fuckers!"
Halfling: "Oh my giddy aunt! What a fine dumpling I find myself in!"
Kobold: "AIEE! This is how we die by the dozens!"
Lizardman: "Swamp-gas and crocodile teeth!"
Orcish: "God-spite and futile sacrifice!"
Centaur: "Curse of ill-crossed stars and burning praerie!"
Satyr: "Who spilled the wine?!"

[Zhym]

"What the—'futile rat-fucker blossoms of spring dumpling sacrifice?'" mutters Andover aloud as he rushes to Porphyry's aid.

The Satyr alarm is my favorite.

[AleBelly]

Candy sighs, annoyed that her attentions are being torn from the dead metal golem. "I suppose we should help, Wrenly. You go first" she cackles.

[Hotgoblin]

Saving Throw/Ability Check [1d20] = 8

[ChubbyPixie]

Wrenly the Brown, Human MU

"Hmmm? Oh, my..." says Wrenly snapping out of his intense focus on the metal man and its workings. "Yes. It sounds like trouble. It's been a while since I've heard that amount of bleating from Porphyry - must be serious. Have you got many spells at your disposal, Candy? - May I call you Candy? - I'm running a bit low. Let's go see what we can do, shall we?" He hikes up his robes and scampers down the hall towards the sound of the commotion. When he gets there he'll hide around any cover he can find (perhaps in the short North-South hallway) and attempt to assess the situation.

[ChubbyPixie]

"You musn't harm the Lizard! I've just healed him!" cries Brother Puddington. He considers trying to help Swillbosh to loosen the tentacle, but realizes he won't be much help to the burly fighter. Noting the way the golems hover, seemingly by magic, he attempts to disperse it through prayer. Grasping his bejeweled holy symbol, he points it in the direction of the creatures and requests the aid of Ulaa.

Puddington casts Dispel Magic.

[AleBelly]

Wrenly the Brown, Human MU

"Hmmm? Oh, my..." says Wrenly snapping out of his intense focus on the metal man and its workings. "Yes. It sounds like trouble. It's been a while since I've heard that amount of bleating from Porphyry - must be serious. Have you got many spells at your disposal, Candy? - May I call you Candy? - I'm running a bit low. Let's go see what we can do, shall we?" He hikes up his robes and scampers down the hall towards the sound of the commotion. When he gets there he'll hide around any cover he can find (perhaps in the short North-South hallway) and attempt to assess the situation.

Candy grins. "He's so...nice. I can have some fun with this one" she thinks to herself.

"Call me whatever you want, turd robe. And yes, I may be able to aid those bozos with my arts..."

She follows the mage.

[AleBelly]

"Sounds like Fingal and the goat man have gotten us into trouble again" sighs Wulfhart to Gryev. "Let's go pull their asses out of the fire."

[tkrexx]

Guido, Cleric

Hey! Stop that! Guido sputters, awash with surprise. He was only trying to speak with you! Temporarily forgetting he advised caution only a moment ago, he moves his bulk toward Porphyry's position and juts his shield between the Satyr and the strange metallic being, hoping to block whatever beam is holding him aloft. Behave yourself! There is no need for us to fight.

[Grognardsw]

R̵͉͙̘̬͓̰̼̺̥̹̫͙͖̗̊ͤ̇̓ͫ̒̀͢͝ͅu͆ͨͫ́̚͏͍̘̳̹͓͖͓̩͔̥͖̣ͅͅc̶ͤ͋̑̅ͩ̃ͨͭͯ͛́ͦ̒̉ͪ̏̿͢͏͖͇̰̹̙̠̳̫̰̹͖͔͇̜͘ḳ̸̜̞̦̱̇ͫ̑̔̑̇́͊ͭ͊͗͌͢͡u̞̮̪͉̹̺͚̣͔͒̑ͫ̍̃ͧ̓ͮͣͦ̉͗̽̈̇̂̕s̸̡̢͈̱̖̭̝̔̈̃̌̃ ̩̼͕̼̲͙̙̲̣̮̫̰̦̹͕̦̪̯́ͩ͋͛ͩ̓ͩͣ̀͆̽̽ͩ͒͌̀̎͋̚͢w̴̨̄̋ͥ͊̑͗ͥ͑͋̎ͪ̈́ͪ͗̈́͡͏̙̱̟̠̥̬̭͇̝̙͍̜ͅḯ̸̞̗̱̜̥̱̞̻̤̟̲̙̱͒͆̈́͊ͦ́ͭͤ̐̐̽̐͐̈́ͯ̆̅͛̀͝t̛̟̳̤͈̲̬͙̥̱̣̓͛ͦ̆ͣͪͧͦͮ̍̒̌̌ͧ̕͞h̤͇̫̞̣͓͙̯͕͛ͮ͊ͨ̔͑͝͞ͅ ̨̨̛̭̻̳̥̜̩͉̝̼̩̪̱͑̃ͬ͂̍̈́̄ͯ̋̋̅ͫͯ̎R̨͔̭͌ͮ̆ͬ̇͗̓́̄͆̓̊̅̉͆ͧͧ̚ͅͅȏ̢͇̣̳̠̦̰ͤͥ̆ͬ̑̎ͦͫͪ͆ͤͥ̑̇̽͌͜b̴̴̭͖͉͍̝͙̱͚͖̦̲̟̝͂͆ͣ̉̅̈́ͨ̐̂͒̚͞o͉̱͇̻̘̼͙̪̖̺̤͈̗̙̺̘͚͇̽ͫ̽̈́͒̋́t̷̢̤͚͍̞̝̺̼͈͖̟̳̰͖͈͎̭̏̾ͣ̾͝ͅs̶̸̬̟̪͉͇̫̟͓̘̤͉̙̤ͧ̈́̽͗̓̀ͤ͆̒̒̽ͥ̚ͅ ̢̝̝̱̱̮̞̻͙ͨͮ̅̿ͯ̉ͩ̿̒̋̇ͨ̀͞ͅ-ͨͩͪͭ͏̵͉͍͚͈̜͙̪͔̭͍̝̞̟͝ ̛̠̞̳͖̯̗͉͕̪̬͉͕͔͎̤̋ͧͨ̈̇̑̾̾͊̌ͥ̋ͫ̉͋ͬ̉̚͘R̛̺̼̟̥̜͙͚͉̙͈͔̗̫͊͋̾̒̽͋̆͂͐ͩͥͩ̄́̇̈́̚͞ơ̴͖͕̬͊̆̅̽̓͆ͣ̏ͦͮ͒ͮͨ̃͛́̀̚͠ͅủ̵͙̠̼̱̲͍̞̤̜̮̣̲͇̳͔̮̣̺̉͛̏̌̾̊̉́͜͟ṋ̛̮̖̠̝͉̼̳̪̞͔ͮͤͭ͒͑ͤ͛͑̔̍̓ͥ̀̾̍ͭ̅ͪ͟ḑ̲̼̟̣͉͓͍̗̳̯̜͎̤͊̐͌̈́̓̀̄̈ͯ̈́͌̾́̚͟ ̴̆̆͛̿͋̈҉̖̮̻̳̦̩̩̘̤ͅO̢̬̱̬̙̝̲̻̥̲̙̠̦̜͖̣ͨ͆̌ͫ̊ͦ̋̅̃͛͛̆̾̽̕͢͞n̶̨̲̩̟̺̯̝̭̣̟̱̮̰̲̳̟̘̮̬̂͋ͤ̌ͭ̈́̏͊͛ͮ̏͝͡e͖͈̞̣͈̤̤̹̻͙̬̠̤̥͖̙͓͋ͧ̃͋̋̀͌͘͟







"
W̭̠͖͕h͍͓̲̲̦aͧṫ͒ ̞͎͔͓̬̗̰͘i̷̲͔̮͔̦̦͈͒̆͂̒ͯs̨̃ͫ͑ ̺̭̞̻̲͕͒̂t̹ͮ̀h͙̺͗͗͂e҉̣̠͚͎̱͙ͅ ̌͌ͭ̆ͪͧ͘ǹ͖̰̙̯á͙̤͕̌̿̓̔̚ṭ̝̳̯̳́͋ͬ͛̐u͋̾r̢̫͙͋̏͋̓͒ê̸̠̼͗̃̑̔̐̊ ̷̩̾ͣ̑͒o̭̩̙̟̤̲̖f͓͎̣ͯ͐̌ͧ̀ ̧̣̹ͦ̐y̷̬͛ͦ̆̽̽ͭ̏o͖̝͈̭̹͉͔̿̋̑ͧ̈́̅͢ũ͉͝r͕͂ ̀ͩ̇͘bͥ̐̅̉͐̀͜u̇̌̃ͪ҉̭͚̦̺͔̙͖s͚i̻̰̤̬̹͐ͨ̀̂͋n̝͇̣̱̙̲ͨ͊̉̃ͤͩe̝̺̪̭͌͐͊̿͐s̫ş̭̖͎̓ͧ̊̐ͩͯ.̥̖͔̬̉̈͒
̸̣̺̀ͫͦ̒̚S͋̏̓t̳̓ͩ͋̾a͔t̀̈͐ͩͦ͆̿͟e̙̠̟̣̚͢ͅ ͎͌̊͛̄̓͞ţ͓̭̼̍͆̊̊͒ḧ̪̙̭̥̘̱̩́̔ͨḙ̷͐͒̔ͫ ͈̭͚̦̖̪̘͛͊ͪͦ̽ͥ̽̀p͉͎̽ͣ͜u͙̔ͭ̇̔̆ͅr̷̩̪̜̜̖̥͉̓ͩ̐̊ͩ̚p̪̠̩͔̎̄͞o̙̫̗̱̓ͅs̙̄̊ͭ͌ͩ̈eͫ͊̂͏͍ ̜̜̮̂ͦͥͅͅǫ̱̫ͨf͙ ̤̬̩̰̱̼͈͐̅̈̔͋̚͟y̸̻̟̝̜̲̾͒̚ǫ̻̻͊ͮ͒̔̃̚ư̹͚̟̹̰͉̹̓r̴̻̲̙͙͔̥̖͂ ̺̌ͧͥͣͮ̓v̟̱̻̦̰͎̮̽̓̇́͂͛͟i̊̐͛̾ͣ̎̈́́s̖̠̺̰ͫͤ̌ͥ͂̀i̱̘͍̚t̪̖̪͕̪̔ͣ͆͜.͔̌
̜͎̻͚̺̪ͩ̒͑̉͒͊R̸ͯͤ̋̎e̟̥̎ͫ̎͢s͓̻͚̥̳͙̝͊ͪ͡ȋs̰̾̇̇̚tͤ͋a̓̈͆n͉͎͈̞̬̾ͭ̅͗͋̇̉c̦̟̹͎͎̰ͮͮ̒̇e̦̭͍̐͗͜ͅ ̥͈̰̜̰̝̱ͫ́̿̔̅͊̽͟ī̢̮̱̙̯͙͎ͩ͗ͣͭs̩ͭͥ ͇̼͑̏̉̉̽ͅf̋̎͐̐ủt͔͍̗̱̠͍̝̀̈i̳̙̻̜̿̾̈́l͖͔͘e̥̣͕͓̲͖̎ͦͤ̄̓ͣͅ.͓͆̓ͤ̔̓́
̶̲̜̭̗̘̠ͅ
̘ͦ̓́
̺̰̝͒ͮͯ̆ͨ̈́̊͜
̝͔̥̍ͧ̔̌͠

", the automatons say as Porphyry the polymath entreats them in many tongues. The metal creature seems to have the satyr in a telekinetic grip, moving him in the air toward it and then through the north door in the room (see map.) Andover and Guido bravely rush forth, the cleric interposing his shield between golem and Porphyry. The satyr drops to the floor; Andover grabs him and pulls him back to safety. But Guido's shield, and his arm in it, are suddenly yanked hard and he is pulled toward the golem, getting dragged along through the north door into a hallway with little rooms to the east and west. The metal menace places Guido into a 10'x10' room on the right and pushes a button. There is a feint crackling sound and glow at the edges of the door frame. Guido feels the pressure of the magic telekinesis on him stop.

Groyn the dwarf feels his body stiffen as he becomes paralyzed. The golem that hit him with the head beam moves over and picks him up by the left ankle with one of its pincer arms. It brings him through the north door,tosses him into a 10'x10' room, and pushes a button. There is a feint crackling sound and glow at the edges of the door frame. The dwarf is still paralyzed. Swilbosh the lizardman is unable to break free of the tentacle of the monster on him, and is dragged and tossed into a little room like Groyn.

Brother Puddington prays to Ulaa to dispel the magic of the hovering metallic monsters. Their magic must be too mighty, or not magic at all, for the cleric's divine spell has no effect. Getafix the druid and Asherrion the Gray watch the commotion from the doorway, unsure of what to do but ready to take action.

Wulfhart and Gryev hear the brouhaha and promptly make their way over to the scene, followed by Candidias and Wrenly. They all arrive to see the three metal creatures hover through the north door with their captives.

Fingal arrives last from the kitchen, his orange glass card in hand, and is told what the others saw.

Actions for Round 2!

- Initiative: Monsters [1d6] = 5, Party [1d6] = 1. Automatons win.
- Swilbosh bend bars [1d100] = 64. No.

[greyarea]

Getafix casts heat metal on one of the golems!

[greyarea]

Asherrion casts magic mission aiming at one of the golems!

[Pulpatoon]

Porphyry scrambles away from the creatures, trying to make his way out of the room. "I think I'm beginning to understand them! They want to know our purpose, and to assure us that resistance is futile! I'm inclined to believe them and suggest retreat!"

I'm unsure if picking out words from the robot-garble counts as OOC knowledge or not.

[ChubbyPixie]

Wrenly the Brown, Human MU

"Candy. I shall have to rely on you - the only potentially useful spell at my present disposal is one that would, I fear, destroy the majority of us as well as our assailants. Therefore, I should be happy to offer my services in a critiquing capacity," says Wrenly. He folds his hands and looks expectantly at Candiasis, then gestures towards the metal creatures and smiles. "Whenever you're ready."

[tkrexx]

Guido, Cleric

This is not at all neighborly! He protests from behind the glowing doorway.

[Zhym]

Seeing that the golems have yet to use lethal force, Andover holds his fire. "We come in peace!" he says.

[saalaria]

Sorry - phone trouble recently, posting a bit spotty

Swilbosh removes a torch from his pack and throws it at the glowing doorway

[ChubbyPixie]

Brother Puddington, Human Cleric of Ulaa

Brother Puddington stares in horror as his dispelling utterly fails and then as his brother in spectral arms, Guido, is thrown unceremoniously in what can only be some sort of jail cell. As the Satyr gallops past and the golems begin to return, he unceremoniously turns tail and runs out the door, making a hard right and running up the north, south hallway. "I'll be back, Guido! Do not despair!"

[AleBelly]

Candy glares at Wrenly as he offers to critique her performance of the magical arts. But she struggles with which spell to cast. Her bolt of lightning would hit Fingal, or even worse, might bounce back and hit her. A web won't protect them from the automaton's rays.

Her instincts for self-preservation kick in. She begins chanting arcane words, again producing more images of her own person.

Mirror image roll [1d100+5] = 95+5 = 100

"Get behind me you dummies! If they follow us, I'll fry 'em!"

She begins retreating down the hall towards the metal golem they were previously inspecting.

[AleBelly]

Wulfhart turns to Gryev. "We better listen to her" he suggests, retreating down the corridor, yet facing the strange metal creatures in case they attack.