Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

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Pulpatoon
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Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#1 Post by Pulpatoon »

Behind you is the beanstalk. Your backs still ache from the long climb, despite the handholds carved by generations of adventurers who have preceded you. You are standing on a cloud.

Most of the present company met for the first time, yesterday, at the small village of Ballyjack in the shadow of the great beanstalk, each with your own reasons for facing the perils of the Castle.

Across the misty plains of cloud it looms, a massive structure of ivy-covered black stone that threatens to blot out the blue dome of the sky.

It extends for miles in every direction, its facade carved with gargoyles and women, their skirts asunder and their hands outstretched in a beckoning gesture. Round towers sprout, weird and oval, at intervals from its walls.

You know this: whoever built Castle Gargantua is long gone. It could have been a mad wizard. He would have been called Gargantua and lived in a tower looming over the castle. Or it could have been a giant so tall that when his shadow was cast, people thought it was the night falling; a giant so primeval that he could barely be distinguished from nature itself, his feet like the trunks of sequoia trees—a primeval ur-giant from a time bygone.

Time has passed since its creator vanished and the Castle has been plundered several times. There's little left of its original riches and most of its legendary beasts have been dispatched by past heroes. But an awful lot of adventurers and bandits continue to roam the Castle halls. And there are still monsters, bred from wild magic and raw chaos in the dark corners of the Castle.

It is terrible, marching across a field of cloud. The vapors stick to your legs and drag at you like a bog, and yet your feet never feel firmly planted enough to assure you that your weight is securely supported, so far above the unyielding Earth.

As you trudge closer, you see a massive 90' high double brass door right in front, the stone around it all jagged and cracked. There's a huge face carved into the door, its features like those of a grinning, mad giant.

Image

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#2 Post by Wizard Lizard »

Vanis looks uneasy, trying to understand how the cloud keeps him and his companions from falling to a certain death, and eventually gets on his knees to try and take some strangely solid (or is it) cloud in his hand.

"This is quite peculiar. Quite peculiar indeed." He says, before approaching the door, to try and get an idea of how big the face is up close. Not without checking regularly that his companions are close, for he is not a very brave man.

Is there any sort of mechanism or contraption that Vanis can see from a respectable distance? Say, about ten feet from the giant's face.

[Am I doing it right? :| ]

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#3 Post by Pulpatoon »

(You're doing great!)

The face on the door is probably 30' tall, from top of pate to the end of its beard. It is situated about 40' up on the massive doors, just about half their height.

No mechanisms are visible, but the lips of the carved face are moving. The face is mumbling in audibly to itself.

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#4 Post by GreyWolfVT »

Kurt feels around for solid ground unsure what to think of standing on a cloud "How is this possible are we on cloud nine?" a look of genuine confusion on his face. Stopping what he is doing with the cloud he turns to look at the 30' giant face "What if we just poke it in the eye? Anyone have a stick with them?"

Hows that for playing a handsome idiot?
“All men did have darkness. Some wore it in the form of horns. Some bore it invisibly as rot in their souls.”
― Paul S. Kemp, Shadowbred
"If good people won’t do the hard things, evil people will always win, because evil people will do anything."
― Paul S. Kemp, Twilight Falling

Algrim Tirion Dwarf - HarnMaser
Dalin Silverhand Dwarf Thief - Barrowmaze
Elwood 'Dug' The Bounty Hunter Dwarf Swashbuckler - Hedge's Adventures in the World of Golarion
Roan Gravelbeard Dwarf Fighter - Hedge's Greyhawk Adventures
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DM - GreyWolf's Mystara Adventures - AD&D 2e

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#5 Post by mb. »

Deet stares open-mouthed up at the doors and giant face, leaning on his musket and mumbling to himself "brass is an alloy of copper and zinc. Also sometimes lead."

His brother Odric gives him the side-eye and sighs.

Deet waves up at the face, and calls out, "Hallo Door Face! Do you have Friederika?" Odric winces.
Last edited by mb. on Mon Nov 21, 2016 11:32 am, edited 2 times in total.

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#6 Post by Pulpatoon »

Looking slightly startled, like an old man roused from a nap, the giant face's eyes pop open, and its mumbling gets louder:
"...mumble... grumble... comes the great tamer of the Celtic Cimbri, so afraid of the dew that he flies through the air. Against his coming they've stuffed the troughs with fresh butter, falling like a SHOWER."

The voice reaches a volume that shakes the air and churns the cloud under your feet. As the lips move, flakes of verdigris the size of saucers crack and fall around you.

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#7 Post by GreyWolfVT »

Kurt covers his eyes "No, no too loud ah thats too loud."
“All men did have darkness. Some wore it in the form of horns. Some bore it invisibly as rot in their souls.”
― Paul S. Kemp, Shadowbred
"If good people won’t do the hard things, evil people will always win, because evil people will do anything."
― Paul S. Kemp, Twilight Falling

Algrim Tirion Dwarf - HarnMaser
Dalin Silverhand Dwarf Thief - Barrowmaze
Elwood 'Dug' The Bounty Hunter Dwarf Swashbuckler - Hedge's Adventures in the World of Golarion
Roan Gravelbeard Dwarf Fighter - Hedge's Greyhawk Adventures
Torvik Shadowhood Dwarf Fighter/Thief - Nocturne
DM - GreyWolf's Mystara Adventures - AD&D 2e

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#8 Post by Wizard Lizard »

This strange sentence reminded Vanis of an old book he'd read in a vain attempt to get into school. He had reached half of the book before his father threw it in the sea to "teach him about trying to learn ridiculous things like humanities and letters instead of eating candies". The words came through his mouth with a slight stutter, for he was indeed very scared.

"F-Fish it, Sir! I Pray you, b-because thy beard...thy beard is almost all beray'd...or that you would hold to us a scale?!"

He said, trying to dodge the dangerous falling objects while keeping a semblance of manner.

Oh man, I never realised litterature studies could help me survive a dungeon. My book is in french, though.

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#9 Post by mb. »

Schroff begins running tight circles around Deet's feet, barking loudly. Deet startles, fumbles his musket from hand to hand, then claps them both over his ears, biting his lip.

After the rumbling stops, he stares open-mouthed at Vanis' reply. Nodding at Door Face, "He spake sense? So he has Friederika? Or... or he doesn't? Or?"

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#10 Post by mjulius »

Lascivious Brick eyes the carvings and smacks his lips noisily. Langston, leaning casualy upon his axe, says, "You're foul and amoral, Brick."

As the statue mumbles to a roar, Langston startles, preparing to dive for cover among the breath-swept ground clouds. Brick, momentarily transfixed by the sensual stone carvings, grins and ducks.
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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#11 Post by Stirling »

'Shaggy' Beaker

Complete in tricorn and velvet's, the crier rings his bell, "Oh yeah, oh yeah, gathered here today. Now we'll have no more of that, animations which answer back. ."

Beaker rings the bell primarily to get the giant face to look at him and shut up. "Now if I've gained your attention, kindly open the door."

He nods to little shadow thing hiding under his huge cloak, gathered around him like a comforting blanket. "Perhaps Sir, I can stick him wiv this an do the lock pickin' fing if it don't open up like old Bella's corset." says a scruffy urchin who points a slim blade in the direction of the door

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#12 Post by Pulpatoon »

As the great face bellows, and spouts nonsense, the party reels and scrambles, but the confectioner, Vanis responds in kind:
Wizard Lizard wrote:"F-Fish it, Sir! I Pray you, b-because thy beard...thy beard is almost all beray'd...or that you would hold to us a scale?!"
The great head looks surprised. "Eh? What's that? Someone speaks the grandmother-words?" The eyes strain to look down and see the source of the voice, but, given your position at the foot of the door, it can't quite get an angle on you. "A learned soul, a powderful brain, after all these years, to know the antidotal jo—"
Stirling wrote:Complete in tricorn and velvet's, the crier rings his bell, "Oh yeah, oh yeah, gathered here today. Now we'll have no more of that, animations which answer back. ."
"Who is making that clatter?! Why, that's just rude—"
Beaker rings the bell primarily to get the giant face to look at him and shut up. "Now if I've gained your attention, kindly open the door."
The face bellows out, "OMNIS CLOCHA CLOCHABILIS, IN CLOCHERIO CLOCHANDO, CLOHANS CLOCHATIVO CLOCHARE FACIT CLOCHABILITER CLOCHANTES."

After this arcane outburst, the face settles into a sullen expression and resumes its inaudible mumbling.

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#13 Post by mjulius »

Brick climbs to his feet, cocks his head to the side and slowly smacks his opposite ear as if to knock the loud from his head.

He lears at Vanis, "Heh. It likes you, schoolboy. Do you remember anything else from your books and bygone years?"

Langston pulls himself up from the the fog. He walks to the door, dragging his axe, then quietly tests the brass with short soft kicks from his toe of his boot. As he does so, he examines it for alternative handles, previous entries or cracks/fissures in which he might wedge a blade.
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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#14 Post by Wizard Lizard »

mjulius wrote:"Heh. It likes you, schoolboy. Do you remember anything else from your books and bygone years?"
Vanis looks puzzled. "Something about clocks? I don't remember anything about clocks. At least it answered at some point, maybe it could be worth it to try again? But please, in that case, don't go sticking things in its eyes or ears, or other such agressions...I don't want to get eaten by a door."

He goes to stand in front of the face, at a distance so that it would see him and hopefully accept to open after a few more verses. Especially because as he mentioned, Vanis knew not much of the old book, for his memory was filled with candy and beatings.

Coughing loudly as to get the thing's attention, but not too loud.

"Eh...Oh, Door, please listen again! It goes something like this, the "grandmother-words", right?
No sooner did the Cymbrians' overcomer
Pass through the air to shun the dew of summer,
But at his coming straight great tubs were fill'd,
With pure fresh butter down in showers distill'd:
Wherewith when water'd was his grandam, Hey,
Aloud he cried, Fish it, sir, I pray y';
Because his beard is almost all beray'd;
Or, that he would hold to 'm a scale, he pray'd.
"

And, mumbling to himself : "And they better poke it fast if it does try to eat me."

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#15 Post by GreyWolfVT »

Kurt stops trying to find a stick to poke the face and backs away from the door when it's volume is too loud once more covering his eyes. "Make it stop oh lord it is too loud."

William the lantern boy stops his master and tries to calm him down "Now now sir we don't want to fall off the cloud do we? Lets come over here and try to calm down a bit now eh?"

Hans snickers at his master then hides it if anyone notices walking over to help calm Kurt down mumbling "You handsome idiot...if my dad were a rich judge..."
Last edited by GreyWolfVT on Mon Nov 21, 2016 9:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
“All men did have darkness. Some wore it in the form of horns. Some bore it invisibly as rot in their souls.”
― Paul S. Kemp, Shadowbred
"If good people won’t do the hard things, evil people will always win, because evil people will do anything."
― Paul S. Kemp, Twilight Falling

Algrim Tirion Dwarf - HarnMaser
Dalin Silverhand Dwarf Thief - Barrowmaze
Elwood 'Dug' The Bounty Hunter Dwarf Swashbuckler - Hedge's Adventures in the World of Golarion
Roan Gravelbeard Dwarf Fighter - Hedge's Greyhawk Adventures
Torvik Shadowhood Dwarf Fighter/Thief - Nocturne
DM - GreyWolf's Mystara Adventures - AD&D 2e

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#16 Post by mb. »

Deet stares wide-eyed as Vanis recites, swiveling his head between him and Door Face, occasionally mumbling comforting facts to himself – "Butter is about eighty percent fat, the rest is water," and "On average beards grow six inches per year," and so on – as he vigorously scratches his wooly sideburns.

Schroff sits on his haunches in front of Shaggy, ready to growl at him should he raise his bell again. Odric leans on his sword and yawns.

Pulp: is there any kind of handle, pull, knocker, or anything else on these doors other than Door Face?

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#17 Post by Pulpatoon »

Door-Face again starts as though woken suddenly from a nap: "Huhr?! Powderbrain? Back again? Did you leave that terrible tongue-clapper behind? I can't stomach boorish behavings—on account of not having one. Still, some say that licking a slipper is better than winning a pardon, as well you know.

"What brings you to my stoop, Powderbrain?"


The doors have no visible locks, keyholes, knockers, or pulls. There are variations in the verdigris, however—spots where bright bronze shines through from contact. There is such a smudge around hand level, and another, much broader and higher up, near Door-Face.

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#18 Post by Wizard Lizard »

Conveniently ignoring the first question, Vanis dances from one foot to another, quite intimidated by the booming voice, again.

"Well, great door, have you a name so that I may adress you with proper respect? After our long climb, me and my companions are merely trying to seek refuge inside this colossal place. I-I can't speak for everyone, but as a sweet-maker, and occasional baker of pies, I wish to get inside in order to discover the many ingredients that are rumoured to be in this place: how else but with the best components could one aspire to make the best delicacies?"

The man takes great pride in his trade, and it shows: his shaking is almost reduced to the occasional twitch.

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#19 Post by Pulpatoon »

Door-Face: "A pantry-raider, Powderbrain? Alook for tasty tidbits? A crumb of cheese, a heel of bread, a brace of smoked tongues, a pot of beef pickled in mustard, salted sweetmeats, a barrel of tripe, fish in jelly, the odd pearl of caviar that rolled under the credenza?

"I've had worse cross my threshold. Soldiers, cutthroats, bandits, burglars, whoremasters, courtiers, archaeologists, miners, politicians, merchants, deserters, false prophets, carpet-baggers, assassins, revolutionaries, torturers, mutilators, flagellators, pirates, vigilantes, forgers, corsairs, moneylenders, traitors, seditionists, smugglers, necromancers, philosophers, apostates, tyrants, narcissists, muggers, arsonists, snake-oil peddlers, cannibals, defilers, marauders, bear-baiters, charlatans, industrialists, and, generally speaking, predators and fuck-trumpets of every stripe.

"So what matter one little mouse, seeking his crumb?

"If you would enter, you would do well to follow the advice I once overheard the Queen of Sheba give to the Archbishop of Alexandria, and 'Give it a push.'"

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Re: Chapter 1: To seek a Great Perhaps

#20 Post by Stirling »

Shaggy Beaker

He rings his bell once, twice would be nice but thinks better if it. Pointing to his urchin, "He is also My, room for another in your house. He has none of his own you see."

Beaker pushes in behind Mouse and shepherds him across the threshold as the door opens. "Come Mouse, we enter as we are, leaving people will herald our return not tolling mournful bells."

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